Sorry Kiddo It’s in your Jeans.

So today I made the trip across the city to Costco.  A pilgrimage of sorts, to the warehouse where I can easily spend way too much money.  My shopping list was simple.  Fruit, some sort of veggies for snacks, toilet paper, and a rotisserie chicken to deconstruct for dinner.

I wandered around the store, the smell of steak wafting through the store… sorry sample lady, steak is not on my list of buying items, and I do not want to sample your wares.  Thank you anyway.  Plus I prefer my steak rare raw. I pushed past the sample lady and past Mr Blend-o-matic with his Starbucks Frappuccino looking blenders.  I glanced at the Red Velvet Cake that is only $7.99 this cake is massive and looks so good!  I closed my eyes shook my head no and pushed the cart passed to the chicken case… defeated!  No Chickens!!! Luckily the timer was beeping on the ovens which meant shortly there would be fresh little birdies ready for my dinner!

I wandered through the cheese section.  I am a cheeseaholic.  I could easily make a meal (and have in the past) from just cheese.  I am happy to report that Costco now carries the Babybel Light in addition to the regular kind.  The individual waxed package kind, they also have the light swiss wedges.  I eyed them, and weighed my options… looked at my list and put them back in the case.  While I love me some cheese not this time. I still have quite a bit of cheese in my fridge.

I next hit my favorite part of the store.  It used to be my little piece of heaven on earth for different reasons.  The little cold storage produce room.  If you have ever been to a Costco or a BJ’s or Sam’s Club they all have one of these rooms (or the ones I have been all have them).  This is a temperature controlled room where they store the veggies and fruits that are supposed to be refrigerated.  I used to love this room because it was the nicest feeling in the world to just relax in the room.  I wanted to pull a bed in there and sleep in there.  Now it is merely my heaven on earth because my veggies are in there.  English cucumbers, massive quantities of green grapes, pineapple, strawberries, blackberries, mushrooms and assorted other goodies line the walls and center pallets.  It really is a wonderland!

Exiting the tiny wonderland I headed back over to grab my chicken then toilet paper.  As I headed up towards the registers.  I walked past the tables of clothes, sadly tabled full of clothes that never came in my size.  Oh how I wanted to fit in those clothes.  I saw a table of Gloria Vanderbilt jeans for $16.99 with a $5.00 instant rebate on them.  What are the chances… I looked at the list, crunched it up in my hand.  I went over to the table and started flipping through the disheveled table.  It was really a disastrous looking table.  I looked through piles of size 8, 10, & 12.  I became discouraged.  As I was about to give up, I pulled one last pair from the pile… a size 18.  (Now the pants I wore out with Jenn the other day were a 16, but I know for a fact they are a generous 16! I have another set of 16’s that I muffin-top over like crazy.  So an 18 looks to be just perfect with my stupid stomach paunch. ) So Shopping List be damned I tossed them into the cart! The 22’s I was wearing are making me do the saggy-step-and-pull! Where every time you take a few steps they sag and you have to pull them up.  It isn’t near as bad as they have been in the past.  I will not let myself look that unkempt again.

So I made my way toward the front of the store, new jeans in the cart, spotted 100 calorie packs of Popchips!  List now crunched up in my pocket tossed them into the cart too!

I left Costco with more than I planned, which was bound to happen.  I left with a Non-Scale Victory tucked into my reuseable canvas bags.  Those Pants you see were magic.  Those pants hold in them a victory that when I got my Costco membership was a pipe-dream. 

When I got home after a few more stops, one at Whole Foods for some more Barney Butter, and one at Lunds for some Hissho Sushi (ok it wasnt real sushi, it was the PFC Roll, which is Papaya, Figs, and Cream cheese) I tried the pants on and guess what… THEY FIT! Your ass your sass it’s in those pants Kris!  I did a little booty wiggle, and looked at the detailing of the pants as I ripped the stickers and tags off.  They have a tiny bit of sparkly detailing on them just to remind me that  I am a rock star and I will shine!

3 thoughts on “Sorry Kiddo It’s in your Jeans.

  1. Come to think of it, I was never able to buy clothes at Costco when I had a membership there, either. And about 70% of the produce I used to buy from the lovely chilled produce room would go bad before I consumed it. I may not be perfect, but not a single item of fresh produce has been rotted and discarded in this house in months. Thanks for helping me realize my little victory, too!

    You’ve gotta wear those jeans next time we hang out so I can take a pic of you, Ms. Rockstar!

    • WOOHOO for not making soup in your fridge with produce!! I am real good at eating the fruit and veg I buy. I love it too much to let it rot

      I will definatly wear those pants next time we go out. \m/ rock on \m/ lol

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