From Scratch, Creating a New Life.

Creating a new life, from scratch… no I’m not pregnant, although if you check out my instagram, facebook or twitter feed you will see comments about how I look like I am glowing or radiant. However this past week it’s like I am finding a whole new world, or as I prefer to think of it I am creating my own. As of Friday afternoon as I packed up my stuff, took a look out my window, and shook my head as if it were all but a dream, I knew my life had been changed. I completed my second week on the job at my new place of employment. It has truly been awesome. Yeah okay, awesome is one of those words that gets overused, so we end up having to make up words for when something truly amazing really happens, but truly the changes that I have experienced in the last two weeks have been astounding.
It was my second full week in my new job. For some reason in my mind I kept thinking it was my first week. I had worked a full week the week before, working two jobs was crazy. I don’t know how anyone can do it, I was exhausted mentally. I guess that in my mind having still been tied to my old employer being at my new job just didn’t feel like it was my new job. It does now, I am slowly settling in, I put a photo on my desk, I have a comfy chair, and some of my things in the drawers. It is all becoming routine.
Pieces of my life are not so much falling into place, as being strategically and surgically inserted. As I mentioned on the blog in a previous post that I started an Aqua Aerobics Boot Camp which I am attending on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday mornings before I go to work. I have missed the water. More than the water, I have missed the classes. I have been in the water on my own, swimming laps, walking in the vortex pool, but I hadn’t found a class that fit my old schedule. This one gets me excited, gets me out of bed.
The second time I was in class, I was more comfortable. It wasn’t that I was uncomfortable in the class, but I hadn’t taken the chance to really say hello to many people before class. At the end of the Monday class, after I had sucked all of my emotions back inside I introduced myself to some of the ladies. Wednesday after class we were all getting ready to leave and it finally dawned on me that two of the women in the class I knew! They looked familiar when we were in the pool, but people look different in bathing suits, then it dawned on me… I had met them previously when I was at weight watchers.
It is a very strange feeling to me that in changing my hours and having only reduced the number of working hours by two each day and adding on a commute that totals just about 30-40 minutes each way I have somehow managed to open up more time in my schedule. Somehow I can now magically easily fit a workout in… and it just works? I know it is just starting out, but it is too simple for me to NOT do it.
Rebuilding my life from scratch in this new daywalker world is weird… Tuesday night I made my return to trivia, which is something I very much enjoy. Since I had taken my old job I had only been able to go one time. That is once in over two years to something that I had done every night for years before that.
I wasn’t sure what to expect when I went back but I was greeted with open arms and a seat at our normal table. People wanted to know where I had been what I was doing now what was going on I had kept in touch with some people but not as well as I had promised or hoped to. I was SO TIRED, I had only planned to stay for a little while. My goal was to stay up until 2100, I made it to the end of the night at just after 2200. More than that I made it to the gym the next morning!
I keep wondering why the people around me keep talking about this transformation they are seeing in me. That I look years younger, and that I seem “better”. I didn’t know how far down the rabbit hole I had gone. Was I really that lost? How did I become so far gone and not realize it? I know stress causes cortisol problems, and there is no doubt that I have some adrenal fatigue issues, but can my body truly be physically responding this quickly?
How fast can my body heal itself getting sleep during the proper hours? How fast can my body start to remember what it was like to be at “peak performance”. I know it is going to be a long road to get back to where I was. I know I lost tone, and strength, and stamina, however the more you give your body the more it wants it. I am trying to get my body back. I am ready to fight… I have been persistent in what I have wanted I keep coming back. I kept changing my style of attack when things didn’t work, but like a dog with a bone I have not given up thus far.
I am excited for the things that are to come, I am excited for the adventure and the promise my life is holding. Just as spring has arrived, I too have arrived, just in time to blossom into a new and promising life.

4 thoughts on “From Scratch, Creating a New Life.

    • Thank you so much Stephanie! I can’t explain how scary it was for me to make this change. Now that I am living this change I am so angry at myself for waiting so long. I suppose we have to do all things in our own time. Making the same mistakes, being rutted, and rooted in a place.
      I wish you lived closer so we could grab coffee and celebrate wih a walk! I hope to see you soon!

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