How Did Your Weekend Go?

How did your weekend go? Did you unintentionally undo the entire weeks worth of hard work over the weekend? Did you head out to a BBQ and have yourself a burger and a few bottles of beer along with a good time and forget about all the tracking and working out it takes to undo those choice? Did you sit in the dark of a movie theater shoving handful after handful of salty buttery warm popcorn into your mouth while viewing a summer blockbuster?
I am here to tell you it will be okay, it isn’t the end of the world, however I am also here to tell you that you need to nip that shit right now! I had a VERY successful weekend. I met, and actually exceeded my goals for activity (on both my Polar Loop, and Weight Watchers Active Link both days). I am super focused right now on what “could” happen if I just gave up.
I can’t give up. Right now I have been given a HUGE opportunity. The question is, what will I do with the opportunity. I have two options the way I see it. I can mope around and mourn the loss of my job, eat garbage and feel like I was a failure. Enter a shame spiral and then truly have failed myself, which will accomplish ZERO things to bring me closer to my goals. Or I can take this time to laser focus on what I want for my life. I am hunting for a job, and while I hunt I can take every opportunity to make sure my nutrition is on point and that I am getting as much activity in as possible. Yes this is ultimately causing a problem for my wedding… in that I now need to have my dress altered, but in the grand scheme of things… if that is the worst thing that is going on… that is truly a first world problem.
In general I don’t really find that weekends have been a problem for me, but I know in talking to a lot of people that it is a truly difficult time for most people to eat right. One of the things that has helped me stay the course, and is often focused on at Weight Watchers is having a snack on hand at all times. I ALWAYS have something on hand. I have had this in place since I was young. It was more ingrained in me because of my brother needing to have something incase his blood sugar dropped, but it carried over into my adult life. There was/is always something with me, be it in my purse or car. Usually Almonds, or an apple, I’ve been known to carry popcorn or string cheese (yes it gets warm, no i don’t care, or mind).
Another things that helps keep me on track for weekends is keeping my routine. I still have a bedtime and an “alarm” or wake up time on weekends. Everyone has a bedtime, not just kids. Whether you know it or not you have a bedtime, it is the time at which you go to bed. Mine tends to be the same time every night. This works for me, it helps ensure that I am “operating” at my best everyday. I prefer to get 8 hours of sleep, I can do with less, I don’t usually get much more because my body just won’t let me sleep more unless I need it.
The last few nights I have been up later than usual, like 10 or 11 PM, it’s okay it’s the weekend, but I am slipping out of my routine and that is stopping tonight.
Summer is starting to slip away, despite the fact that it seems Minnesota is now getting the hottest weather of the year. This means soon my favorite new activity (outdoor swimming) will end. Fall will bring the opportunity to find some new activities. I plan on at least a few 5k’s this fall/winter to help keep pushing me through. I also want to start a training plan and squirrling money away to eventually make my goal of a Disney Run a reality.
So now that Monday is here… are you going to be starting it right? I’ll be drinking my water, eating my veggies & lean protein and getting my exercise in. I want to see progress, I want to feel good, I want to know my hard work is paying off. What is one think you are going to work on this week?

When #JustTrollin means #WycWyc

So today I arrived at my friend Jeans house for a pre-baby shower dinner party. I was early I had come from work. I didn’t know when she and others would be arriving.
Instead of sitting around in the car listening to podcasts or music I took to her quiet neighborhood and went for a walk. Yes I’ve still got the sniffles, no I wasn’t in workout clothes, no I didn’t know where I was going and didn’t plan on it. So what.
I had time and it wasn’t going to go to waste! No more sitting on my rear!! Get it in gear!!

Big Dreams for 33, and Food For Thought.

33… Yep, a double digit birthday. I am choosing to look at this birthday that has just come to pass as the birth of a positive year.  There are a lot of traditions and stigma about the number 33.  I believe (but am not sure so don’t quote me on it) that it is the Chinese that believe the number 33 and women are a bad mix.  There is some superstition about buying meat and chopping it?  What a waste if you aren’t going to eat it in my mind.

I am looking at 33 as holding extra possibilities for positive things to come my way this year.  33 when separated forms two prime numbers.  Two positive prime numbers.  I am welcoming the positive things into my life.  I spent my birthday setting a positive intention for myself, and for the future of others.  It can’t hurt right?

Thank you so much to everyone that wished me well for my birthday! It meant a lot to me that so many people from all over the world took a moment from their day to think of me and wish me well.  It lifted my spirits so high.  Thank you.

So I had planned on no cake for my birthday this year… and I mostly made it… mostly.  But the #JustTrollin side of me says it is time to fess up.  There was lots of cake… Sunday I made cake balls… actually Saturday and Sunday I made cake balls, but not for myself.  I made cake balls for a baby shower, and it was so much fun.  I sampled a bite of one.  That was enough.  There was also a very small Carvel ice cream cake that made its way into my house on Sunday night.  It was the smallest ice cream cake I have ever seen.  I only ever eat the vanilla ice cream off of those cakes so it was in the end a very successful birthday when it comes to food consumption.

I am working on putting together a training plan for myself this week.  With my epic sunburn still healing and my cold still in partial swing I have been a slacker at the gym.  I have been yelling at myself for not going already this week. Tonight I went to a new pool! Not a new gym… a new pool!

Bloomington PoolI confess… I love to swim… however I do not think that I have been swimming outside, since I was probably 16 or 17 years old.  Yep, I’ll wait while you do the math… yes, that would be somewhere in the neighborhood of 16 years of indoor only swimming.

Today I was brave.  I joined my friends Maria and Jean (and Jean’s son, my favorite little boy in the whole wide world Dexter) and went swimming after work!

imageI couldn’t get over how different it felt to be in the water outside in the sunshine.  Obviously I am a summer baby.  Mom tells me stories of how I could swim before I could walk… and how she spent the Fourth of July on a boat on the lake in a bikini because it was too hot for anything else and she just didn’t care what it looked like she was pregnant and uncomfortable.

I felt comfortable at the pool in my suit with my friends.  I jogged and bounced around in the water.  I swam around.  I soaked up some rays, carefully sunscreened 30 mins prior to going out in the sun this time.  I don’t need anymore nasty burns like the one I am still dealing with.

I can’t honestly wait to go back to the pool again.  I think this may have to become a supplement to my summer activity, and it might just be what I have been looking for to change up my summer routine.

Do you have a favorite activity that is different indoors than outdoors?  I know running has to be very different inside than outside, but I never thought swimming was all that different depending on the pools location.  This has been some great food for thought for me.

Feedback Because I’m Still #JustTrollin

So… Fitbloggin is over… back to the real world. Work, life, love, relationships, friendships, be them old or new everything in my life falls under the microscope when I return.  Every morsel that enters my field of vision is being scrutinized extra carefully.  THIS is honestly part of what I look forward to coming back from Fitbloggin.

At the conference so many of us talk about having out batteries “charged” or “recharged” I think of it as being supercharged… and with the creation of #justtrollin and #tribelove I hope that it will allow the charge to last just a bit longer.  I know it wont extend the selfie-shelf life or bring the warmth of the amazing hugs along with it but it might just keep the lazer focus.

Focus… something that I need.  I have heard from several people who read the blog in my offline life, that don’t comment (or rarely do so) that they feel the empowerment that is coming from this blog right now.  The trick is going to be keeping up with it.

I am SO THRILLED it seems that those around me that read my last #JustTrollin blog understood what was going on.  They understood that what I am asking for is to be called on the bull that is going on.  I want to be held accountable.  I don’t want to order something healthy then eat the fries off your plate and have you say, oh its okay… a bite wont hurt you.  I don’t want someone telling me you deserve a treat you worked out, or you need to treat yourself… I need someone reminding me that those things aren’t getting me closer to my goals.

It isn’t that I don’t know that the cupcake is not a great choice, even if it fits within the calorie or weight watchers plan for the day… but there are better choices. It isn’t that I can NEVER have the fries, but I need to be responsible for the decision to have them not take them off someone else’s plan. It seems like people are getting on board with this. Those that aren’t understanding this… well… your relationship with me may have to be put on lockdown… just like those treat days.

The thing about this blog is, since I took the job change that led to my weight gain I did nothing but bitch about what the problem was. I bitched about what I couldn’t get to work. I whined and complained that things were hard and I didn’t have time. Well you know what life is hard and we have changed the situation.

I am no longer in that job, and while I am starting to have progress I am still not giving 100% to what is actually one of my top priorities. I am okay with the fact that one of my priorities is to lose weight. I am okay being selfish in wanting to not be fat anymore… more than not wanting to be fat I just want to feel good. I want to feel “healthy”.

I don’t want my blog to be a reflection of a big whiner that just makes excuses. As Dan pointed out at the welcome mixer, I have a story. I have the confidence to overcome the obstacles that have been placed in my way over and over again. If I can’t go over them I have gone under, or around or even through them.

Why should my weight be any different… well the truth is it isn’t any different. I guess I am again calling myself out in this post for half assing too much of my life. The last two Saturdays I have broken some major walls down in my own active life as far as steps and actual amounts of activity go.

I plan on being active tomorrow, (July 5th) It is going to be hot, and gross, but Sunday (July 6th) is my birthday… I will be 33, and it is time to celebrate another year entering it strong and feeling empowered. The time to feel like a victim for my circumstances has come and gone.

I am leading by example, for myself, for my friends, and for the people who I don’t know. I will not end up a statistic. I will not be someone people have to mourn and miss because I died too young. The time is now.

 

 

Saying Thanks

So I spoke up in my Weight Watchers meeting today. I do that a lot. My meeting is full of amazing people. You wouldn’t think at 0700 on a Saturday morning people would be so lively but truly the meeting is awesome! The thing about the first meeting of the day on a Saturday is the people who are at the meeting… really want to be there and are truly motivated to, well… get shit done. I am a front row sitter. Studies show people who sit in the front row lose more weight… that isn’t why I sit in the front row… I just like it better there, and I didn’t know about the statistic when I started sitting in the front row. I am always so thankful for all the information all the members have, and I like giving back to my meetings when I feel like I have something valuable to share.
Today we were talking about “BLT’s” bites licks and tastes, but more specifically being accountable for them. I felt the need to bring the group off on a momentary tangent on accountability. Specifically not taking your team for granted. I had gotten myself into a routine with my new job of going to the gym 3 times a week. I had been eating well, and then… they closed our pool for cleaning. This shouldn’t be a big deal they do it every year, and the nice part a about being a YMCA member is I have other locations I can go to.
Instead of going to another location I started just walking as my workout. While it was an okay thing, when the pool opened back up I didn’t head back immediately. It took a nudge, a strong nudge from my support team to get me to get back into my routine.
Once I got back to the gym, after one strong push, Robb said he had hoped that I wasn’t upset that he said I needed to get back to the gym and that he was only doing what I had asked him to do. It was in that moment that I realized how very crucial it is that we thank our support teams when they step up for us. When we ask for help we do so for our benefit. It’s easy to forget that it can be very difficult for those close to us to step into the “danger zone” and mention things that may be deemed sensitive subjects.
For me things like portion control or going to workout when mentioned by people I haven’t explicitly asked to help keep me accountable might be enough to turn me into a raging bitch! It would make me feel vulnerable and violated. When approached by someone I have deemed safe and supportive it puts things in a different light.
I wanted to remind others to thank their support people and not take them for granted. It can be difficult for people to speak up even when we ask them to do so. Just keep this in mind as you move along. If your support person/persons are mentioning things to you, make sure you are thanking them, because speaking up is hard!

A Swimmers Life

I do believe that I have officially returned to my “swimmers” life. I was sitting at Starbucks drinking my coffee and I could smell the chlorine on my skin. I showered and scrubbed after my Aqua Zumba class on Saturday morning. (Which by the way I LOVED!!)

I think it must be time to start investigating some new soap again. I have some tea tree soap from Trader Joes that I guess I might try.  I am unsure how to get the chlorine off of my skin. I suppose google will give me 1000 different answers but I was hoping maybe someone that reads my blog might have a “tried and true” product they love? I know I need to find a shampoo that gets the chlorine out. The UltraSwim I have been using is killing my hair. Too many Sulfites I guess.  I may just end up having to give up the coloring on my hair.  I know that sounds like a horrible though.  I mean, I just do it myself at home anyway.  It isn’t as if I am paying hundreds of dollars to have someone put color and highlights in my hair… heck I have issues paying to get my hair cut some days.  My hair is short, my color is important.  As I get older the grey becomes more apparent and I am not vain about it, it’s been there since I was 12… henna was my dye of choice at that age… and it was MESSY!!!

So I guess what I am saying is to the swimmers out there, aside from winning the lottery and being able to move somewhere with my own private water source, be it a body of water that is natural, or putting in my own with lighting to treat it in addition to the chemicals does anyone have any suggestions on chlorine removing shampoo or body products?

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind the smell of the chlorine… I kinda like it (does that make me weirder than I am?)  I just figure it can’t be good for my skin.

Weekend Struggle

What is it about the weekend that just seems to make it so damn easy to stop doing what you know works so well for yourself?  For me I find that it is so easy for me to skip drinking the proper amount of water that needs to be consumed.  I will drink my coffee, and grab a coke zero or a diet root beer when I feel “the thirst” finally hit me.  I am not being proactive about my healthy habits.

My Plant nanny nags me, give me a drink and get one for yourself.  I look at my water bottle and think, It’ll be okay I drink enough.  I have my activity level set as sedentary because realistically I can’t keep up with over 200 ounces of water a day which is what it recommends for my body weight.

I want to be healthy, I want to live balanced.  I don’t however want to spend my entire day in the bathroom.  Saturdays and Sundays are in my mind supposed to be spent relaxing.  The darkness of a movie theater is the best place to be on a hot day.  Sipping on a cold soda shoveling handfuls of salty buttery hot fresh popcorn into your houth in the dark is how I wish I could spend every spare moment of my life.  It can be animated, horror, action the genre matters not, I love the feeling of it… despite people on their cell phones… and I will get up and tell you to get off your phone.  I have been the person to have people ejected from a theater, I have also been the person to tell my own friends to put their phones away.  (I know buzzkill)  This isn’t about movies though.  This is about choices.

Monday morning I didn’t attend my normal Aquatic Bootcamp at work because it was a holiday for me.  Opening Day is a bit of a big deal where I work now and we had the day off to watch the game.  I woke up, got myself a good breakfast at home, and made my way to one of the gyms closer to my home.  There was a shallow water aerobics class I was going to take.  It was, unchallenging.  I pushed myself as much as I could but I felt that the workout was just not sufficient.  While this was a victory of sorts, showing me that I am not as bad off physically as I have built myself to be in my mind, this was supposed to be my activity for the day.

Wednesday morning I arrived to my normal Aquatic Bootcamp class to find that the instructor wasn’t going to be there.  She was sick.  I was faced with a choice, stay and workout or go to work early/get coffee etc.  I stayed.  Others played waterball/volleyball in the pool, I grabbed the water barbells and worked it out.  I did my best to get a workout that felt comparable to what I was missing. However when I honestly look at it I felt a little defeated having not been “worked out” by an instructor.

Friday we had another “weather event” straight out of hell. If hell were made of ice and snow.  I set my alarm early, 5:30, and I still didn’t make it to class at 07:00.  It was 07:30 by the time I made it to the area where I work.  It was a very tough commute.  I felt defeated that I didn’t make it to the gym three times.  I did however keep my water and food on track.

Friday night I went out to dinner with Robb to celebrate his birthday a little early.  We had steaks, and I chose a sweet potato and veggies over some of the naughtier things on the menu.  I ate all of my allotted food yesterday.  I drank all the waters.

As I was in bed last night I found myself looking at all the possible pool workouts for the weekend.  Pickings are slim for sure.  Lots of kids in swim lessons on weekend mornings. I suppose it makes sense, but it is disheartening.  Then there was a glimmer of hope.  A location not too far away, 08:15 Aqua Zumba.

Visions of the fun from Fitbloggin danced in my head as I drifted off to sleep thinking about Zumba, and the ease on the joints the water provided.  At 08:00 this morning my keycard was scanned in at the gym.  I owed it to myself.  I missed a workout.  This wasn’t a makeup workout, this is the beginning of a new relationship with my body.  I am working so hard on ending the cycle of self hate that exists in myself.  Working to end the train that you’re not good enough parade that goes through my head.

I am choosing to focus on one thing at a time that I can change within a day.  I won’t be the same thing each day, and may not be the whole thing each day.  Right now I know that I struggle to drink enough water when I am doing “other” things.  That has to stop.  Water before coffee on weekends will be mandatory.  Slowly I am learning how to take care of myself, by listening.  Are you listening to your body? Is there something you are doing during the week that you aren’t doing on the weekend that might be leading to self sabotage?